Iolausian Limericks Anonymous

Founded by Bwell
Faithful Followers the first week: Catstale, Chrysim and Ceryndip
Later that month: Lanfear and Ceredwyn
And after that:Norcia, Atalanta, Bona Dea

Limericks posted April 12 through May 22

The Discussion
---Inspired by Owlharp's question
There once was a hunter most Golden
And fanfic writers the readers embolden
We've all made him cry
Till he made this reply
"What's with the bendin', mutilatin', and foldin'?"

"Iolaus, my dear," the writers began
"We all love to comfort you, man.
So please don't mind
If we cause you to go blind
The Iolausians will lead you by the hand."

"Dear writers," He began his new plea,
"Though I know I once again will see,
This new gash in my head
Almost made me dead
Look! I'm bleeding, why'd you do this to me?"

The writers' steadfastly pronounced,
"Don't worry, you'll hardly lose an ounce,
If we cause your demise
We're all quite wise
Of the benefits of mouth to mouth," they announced.

"You know I really don't mean to whine,
But now you've troubled my mind
This is all quite hazy
I'm bleeding, blind and crazy
What more trouble can I possibly find?"

The writers gasped"Consider your luck as of late
We can't believe you'd actually tempt fate.
Cut, gored, burned and bruised
Quite inelegantly used
But there are more avenues of agony to relate."

"Now please," he said,"I am his best friend,
But this torment really must end
So couldn't you please
Get Hercules
At least until my body can mend?"

They replied, "Oh Iolaus, it's been done,
And really it's not nearly as much fun
That half-god spiel
Too quickly he'll heal
Our tales would be through before they'd begun.

"So, I'm doomed," cried the shattered soul
"Never again to truly be whole!"
They all fell in step
And answered just, "Yep"
But the result of the muse took its toll.

Then the writers bravely lay down their quills
And one by one comforted Iolaus until
He didn't look sad,
"This isn't so bad"
He said, "Aw, anyway what's a few spills!"

Bwell

Hera is gone back
to whereever she did go
Iolausian list i did lack
but now I am back,
She's still my formidable foe.

Catstale

There once was an Iolausian, catstale
Whose ship was just starting to set sail
What laurels we'll send
To our wonderful friend
Keep us informed for we'll want every detail.

Bwell

Autolycus love Cupcake so fair,
With blue eyes and curled hair.
But the Prince loved her too,
and made poor Auto so blue,
That he stole the sapphire,so There!

And the haiku

Autolycus care?
Cupcake breaking his heart is
a tearjerking sight!

Norcia

What happened to the Iolausians wasn't clear
The Mailing list's silence caused much fear
Where did they go
I wanted to know
Everyone come out; it's lonely out here.

Bwell

The cry went out far and wide
Come on Iolausians there's no need to hide
Iolaus and Hercules, young or old
Are still a sight to behold
So, cheer up, don't be sad
Compared to reruns, this isn't so bad!

Chrysim

This Iolausian isn't hiding
It's my time that I'm biding
My life is just so busy
writing challenges, meetings, and graduation,are throwing me into a tizzy,
And a dance recital on Saturday that's making me dizzy.

Ceryndip

The Iolausians are sleeping
Maybe got a dream worth keeping,
He's blonde and handsome
Worth a king's ransome,
Who wants to quit sleeping
When having THAT dream worth keeping.

Catstale

Welcome to the list, Vicki, our newest find
You'll love it here for Iolausians are kind
The list's a delight
An AID timed just right
But, heck, we always have Iolaus on our minds.

Bwell

A happy All Iolaus Day,
On the IML where we play.
Many things were writ,
Full of talent and wit.
We're a clever lot,won't you say?

And my haiku

All Iolaus Day
lets the Golden One's fans all
Express loyalty.

Norcia

Once an Amazon named Kendaa asked true
"What was the ep from Herk that caught you?"
I was surfing around
And delighted I found
Centaurs on a show that was so new.

"How can TV do this stuff," I inquired
Usually in cheap garbage it's mired.
Then don't ya know
I discovered Sorbo
And suddenly my imagination was fired

The next show I saw did totally enthrall
Iolaus in Pride Cometh Before a Brawl
Twas this show's look
that had me hooked
A confirmed Iolausian answered the call

Bwell

Welcome, all newbies, to a fantastic list
you can check the archive for what you've missed
You'll find we all cheer
About Iolaus here
With great Iolausians who will be glad to assist.

Bwell

There once was an Iolausian Shawnee
Whose talent wasn't difficult to see
She was a temp until
She proved she had skills
Now she joins in the Iolausian dance of glee.

Bwell

Cas, 'tis a wonderful thing to graduate
And you know we all want to celebrate
Not only did you pass
But sixth in your class?
Really all Iolausians know you're first rate.

And speaking of celebrations

With hearts full of joy and anticipation
We join you with glad exultation
It's certainly clear
For 23 years
Igor and Owlharp feel mutual adoration

Bwell

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